A Different Type Of ReUnion

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Over the last few years, I have begun healing from many stories in my past that have kept me from being my most authentic self. I continue to witness parts of myself unraveling while remembering that I am here to love, shine light and serve.  I am clear that the healing never ends but it does shift and powerful awareness, joy and freedom are revealed every time I let go a little bit more.

I recently went to Kripalu and participated in “Teaching Kids and Teens Let Your Yoga Dance.” The practice is called “Where joy and fun meet deep and scared” and that is the truth!

On the surface, I wasn’t sure exactly why I was taking the 5-day certification. Kripalu has been a place of diving deep and finding community and peace for me. The workshop involving dance, chakras, yoga, meditation and positive psychology were all methods that I deeply connected to. The workshop leaders were teachers and friends with whom I have an incredibly close relationship. If anything, it would be time with soul sisters.

The program was geared to kids and teens —  a population I have been working with for close to 20 years. One of my goals is to: “Heal myself so I can heal and serve others”. Something was tugging at my heart, so I listened to my inner guidance and said YES. It was pointing to a ripe opportunity for transformation.

The unfolding and re-uniting with myself began immediately. I knew it was happening, because I experienced it before. In mediation and yoga, there had been moments when my present self held and forgave the younger versions of me with such love and compassion.  I began to witness these moments again and allowed the unfolding to happen. I let the music, movement, and guidance take hold, while I let go of how I looked or if I was doing it “right”. I was open and curious as to how I was feeling. My mind tried to get in the way at first, saying “You’ve done this before,” but there was a stronger power taking over this time. And it was beautiful.

Here are some of the guests who showed up:

−The young child who used to make her dad walk around the house before bedtime, reassuring her that all windows were locked and closets were checked. The 6th grader who felt left out and not sure where she fit in. Somehow she was not smart enough, not pretty enough and just not enough.  The 13-year-old who started drinking vodka at a party and found herself lying trapped under a boy, when she had not even been kissed yet. It wasn’t “sex” but it was scary and confusing and the beginning of a sense of unworthiness. The present me didn’t judge any of these selves, simply noticed the shadows and filled them with light.

−The adolescent who felt disconnected from her body, who didn’t have the confidence to make choices or the voice to speak up when she was taken advantage of sexually.  She saw these experiences as “normal.”  My present self embraced her and carried her away from those scenes. Together, we let it go.

−The 29-year-old who lost her real self in a marriage. She was being a good mom within a “typical family unit,” yet felt alone, unheard and unable to bring out her true light. The present self witnessed her bravery when she took hold of her beliefs and self-worth and entered into a life as a single mom.

−The 35-year-old who, who found her true love, was broken to the core by grief when her fiancé was killed; feeling abandonment, pain and distance from faith. Noticing the grief as it took over and cracked her wide open. Aware of how she felt life knocked her down, broke her down and stole her future.  I welcomed it all, by shining light on the dark places and validating that it was okay, I am safe now, I am love.

Re-Uniting with our dark places provides an opening for the light to shine more brightly. It’s not easy but it’s real.  Through meditation, movement and stillness I witnessed this all.  As I held and danced with all the younger versions of me, we all became woven together as one in love, peace and light. I felt seen and connected and supported by the others in the room.

When I am ready, I greet with love all of my past selves that show up. I am committed to not avoiding, numbing or denying whatever is revealed. I am willing to see things differently. I choose to further heal myself by continuing to shine the light into the shadows. There is always a deeper place to go.

The practice of Re-Uniting allows me to be more compassionate and explore ways to let go and forgive myself. New wisdom and awareness sets me free and creates endless possibilities! I believe in myself more than ever. I can embody my courage and strength, and use my voice and stories to connect to and support others.

One of my greatest desires is to help other people shine their own light by creating relationships and space for them to feel seen, safe and heard.  As I continue to grow and evolve as a holistic therapist, energy healer, workshop leader and author, my profession provides many channels to help others to Re-Unite with and love all the parts of their being.

Perhaps the most profound lesson I am learning is that all of us are created as pure love. Over the years; experiences, stories and relationships create layers that harden and cover that truth. Shadows, doubt and fear can rule our lives, but so can forgiveness and love. The practice of Re-Uniting is about remembering and reclaiming the love and light.  Allowing the shadow parts of ourselves to come to the surface, showering them with light, and weaving them into a peaceful loving whole is a powerful way of letting go and opening up to a life of joy.

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