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A Go-To-Bed Poem (featuring Farts and Butts and Poop)

It’s time for bed!
Let’s get you changed.
Your pillow is waiting,
Your bed is arranged.

Your pajamas aren’t right?
But I think they’re pretty!
Oh. Ok, fine.
Get the ones with the kitty.

Now you’re all set.
Hop into– What?
No, I don’t need
To hear from your butt.

Yes, yes, you farted.
Ha ha. Very funny.
Now get into bed
And go to sleep, honey.

No, come on. Get up.
You can’t sleep on the floor.
…You know what? Sleep there!
I’ll just close the door!

Yeah, that’s what I thought.
Now you’re in bed.
No, your pillow is not
Too small for your head.

What do you mean,
Your sheets are too bright?
You can’t even see them
When I turn off the light!

Yes, fine, one more drink.
Sure, sure, and another.
Now get back in bed.

Hang on, what’s that?
Right there, by your head…
Did you just pull candy
From under your bed?!

Where did you get that?
Never mind. I don’t care.
If you’re gonna have candy
At least you can share.

Ok, goodnight.
Here’s a kiss on your brow.
Let’s get you tucked in.
…Wait. You have to poop NOW?!

So… I’m waiting around
While you do ‘Number Two’
Go ahead. Take your time.
Good thing I love you.

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