Princess or Pornstar?
This will be “R” rated. You should either shut this shit down now, or hang on tight. But I’m giving you fair warning…this will not be for the “GASP did she really just say that-ers”! No siree Bob. This is for the, “Bitch-please I feel the exact same way-ers”! So, let’s get this show on the road, shall we? I am perturbed. Perplexed. Downright bamboozled! I just can’t take it. I am having one of the biggest conundrums of my post-divorce life! I feel ashamed. And dirty. And well, like I’m doing something wrong! But am I really? You be the judge…
I want to be treated like a Princess, but be fucked like a PORNSTAR!
Wow. That wasn’t so hard. Hard. Ha. Too easy, actually. But what is really hard, is getting the respect I deserve from a guy, without acting like a fucking NUN! If we have a connection, and I feel like putting out on the first date…then dammit I WILL! Why am I the whore? Or better yet, why do I feel like a whore? I still deserve to be treated sweetly. Why can’t a guy realize that just because I might talk like a truck driver, and give a great cyber-blowjob…it doesn’t mean that I don’t want to make love!
I still want to be told I’m pretty. And yes, I want my door opened for me. And yes, please pay the bill on the first date. And yes I’m smart; and of course I’m a good mom. Hell, can you even remember I have kids? They do have names. And I have a job…I’m a writer. And not just raunchy stuff, but really heartfelt topics, too! I get it, it’s confusing. There is a fine line between what’s appropriate, and what’s just not. Especially when females are so confident, and strong-willed these days. We are SEXY! But tricky. We demand respect, but we are so in-your-face! Trust me, I wouldn’t want to be a guy in today’s dating world.
I’m just saying it’s not easy getting respect lately, with all the online dating…and cyber shit. And I’m not about to sacrifice who I am to get it. I am very outgoing, and personable. Some might see me as suggestive, or smutty. I guess I just like sex. And what’s wrong with that? Everyone likes sex, they just don’t say it in a blog! Or write it on the bathroom wall, or print it on a blimp. Most of you just keep it to yourself. Hmmm. Keep it to yourself? Or you act like a vixen behind closed doors! Yes, you sneaky little sluts!
A Princess and a Pornstar…PERFECTION!
I mean, why can’t we be BOTH? YES! We can be both! Is it my issue, or his? I guess I want to control the wheel. I say who, I say when...aaannnnd I am quoting Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman which is not a good thing. She was a prostitute. Not helping my case at all! But I think most men would agree, they want a woman that is classy in the boardroom, and a slut in the bedroom. Or something like that. And when I do find the right guy, he will get it. He will totally understand my Princess and the Pornstar thing, and he will respect me for the intelligent woman that I am. He will treat me like a Princess when we are in public. And yes, he will fuck me like a pornstar when we are in the backseat of my truck behind the Harris Teeter. Ha! 😉