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The Working Mom Transformation

As a full time working mom from home, my wardrobe is 90% loungewear. In fact, the Hanes sweatpants at Wal-Mart for $4 are probably my most favorite pair of pants ever. I try to draw the line at going out in public with them though. Let’s face it, when I put on my oversized sweats (that I bought 2 sizes too big when I was pregnant), I’m floating on cloud nine comfort but I do look like a homeless person. I try to have some standards…

I don’t wear makeup but on good days I’ll throw on some mascara so my eyes appear open and maybe some under eye potion to zap the Walking Dead visual. Every day I do take a shower and brush my hair – at least I have that going for me.

On school days, when I pick up my daughter, I swap out my sweats for a pair of jeans – the only ones I own that fit and wear them just for school pickup. Then when I’m safely home, I ditch them for my sweats and they lovingly sit on my dresser until the next day for school pick up. It’s a great routine. The top of me looks reasonable (for my video calls) and the bottom of me, well, I look ridiculous.

Once in awhile, my comfy work at home job requires travel. Most of the time if I travel it’s for an event I’m running so wardrobe isn’t too big an issue – t-shirts and jeans. But when a work meeting with a sponsor or potential sponsor is called, I need a total transformation.

Here are my steps to transform my work at home frumpiness into chic credible meeting mom!

  1. Go to the closet and survey the land. To the left are all the clothes that don’t fit me anymore though I can’t bear to part with in hopes I can some day lose my baby weight. To the right are all the clothes that fit or are hopelessly too big for me to hide the baby weight. In that pile glance at everything that could potentially do the trick and then quickly throw your hands up in disgust and admit defeat.
  2. Go shopping. My meeting is in two days, plenty of time to shop! The only time I can shop includes bringing my one year old who will most likely whine for the majority of the trip while being confined in his stroller and my five year old know it all daughter asking me as I try things on when my belly will go back to normal. I mean it’s been over a year already. Clearly she’s getting impatient.
  3. Find a deal. Get super excited to see that everything is on sale. That will go over much better with the husband because “yes I do have an entire closet full of clothes but have nothing to wear” makes absolutely no sense to him. In fact, it makes him mad. I always have to shop for an occasion, as I have “nothing” to wear yet I’m still out shopping for stuff so obviously I have stuff to wear.
  4. Use your imagination. I see this really trendy, adorable frock and can picture my tall self strutting my stuff with my black leggings and favorite boots. Enjoy that imaginative picture because as soon as I go into the changing room with my children and stroller, that frock is going to look like shit. Yup, I totally forgot for a second I’m not tall at all and this frock makes me look like a homeless hobbit.
  5. Settle. Agree that the frock fits (wow did I lose weight?!) and it doesn’t look THAT bad, right? Daughter agrees and it’s settled. I can picture it now, taller boots or my heels and I can rock the frock. Hustling to the checkout lane, I envision the scarf that best matches, briefly considering my Disney’s Little Mermaid one but quickly remember I’m supposed to look professional.
  6. Trials. The night before the big meeting, I need to lay out all the clothes and try them on because I don’t feel like having a outfit argument with myself at 4:00 a.m. when I need to be getting ready to get on my flight. I realize that the frock is ridiculous; probably the worse-case scenario outfit on the planet. No cardigan or scarf can fix this disaster and curse myself for being so stupid at the store. Back to the closet I go to find the one and only pair of non sweats or jeans I own while praying they fit. I find a shirt I forgot I had and rummage for my lucky blazer – the one I know will always fit me no matter what, such a dear. The outfit is not bad. My daughter approves but still can’t understand why I’m getting all dressed up before bed.
  7. Hard choices. After trying on a few other options and even modeling them for my husband, I select my first one while he silently bitches about the fact that I just HAD to go buy something and then not wear it. Apparently I’m so predictable…
  8. Prepare. I lay out all my clothes and everything the night before so in the early morning I can just get dressed and not think.

And just like that, I’m all ready for my big girl meeting! I take one last look at myself and I feel like I look great. Or as good as a slightly still pregnant looking, usually frumpy, would rather be wearing sweats and a Disney shirt woman can be.


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