Impossible to compartmentalize.
Topic Archives for Uncategorized
Blog Posted by fiona trafton of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
We are living in a world where inequality between the sexes is omnipresent. A man who was caught on tape boasting about grabbing women’s genitals managed to become President of the United States. His rhetoric was also defended so passionately...
Blog Posted by Ailish Delaney of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
(Hangry = being angry because you’re hungry) So a few months ago I decided to go on a diet. Oops, I forgot, we’re not allowed to call them diets, they’re a lifestyle change. My bad. But look, here’s the thing…if...
Blog Posted by Melissa Jacobowitz of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
On some random Saturday when we were young, my sister and I were chowing down on some Pringles. My one-of-a-kind grandfather noticed and immediately scolded us saying that we shouldn’t eat those anymore because they are not real potatoes. He said they...
Blog Posted by Michael Badger of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
Becoming a stay-at-home dad wasn’t something I had planned, it just sort of happened. When my wife and I decided I would be the one to stay home with our children I floundered at first. I depended on microwavable foods....
Blog Posted by Kathryn Reay of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
On one of my early dates with my now husband I remember him talking about how some of his friends didn't really understand his commitments to his daughter as he 'only' saw her every other weekend. I said to him,...
Blog Posted by Jill Wexler of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
Normally when I have a life crisis, my Inner Bitch is there to set me straight. You know damned well your coworker is a passive-aggressive witch. You know this, so knock that shit off about your feelings being hurt. My...
Blog Posted by Nathalie Laitmon of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
Before the twins were born I spent a lot of days at the yoga studio trying clear my mind, center my universe and lose those final ten pounds. I gotta say, I got pretty damn good at those tree poses,...
Blog Posted by Patricia Wood of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
Becoming a mom is truly a magical experience, unrivaled by any other. However, it isn't all fairytales and princesses. Throughout this journey of motherhood, I have come to find that I just might make one badass super villain, and all...
Blog Posted by Karen Meister of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
I admit it. I took the candy. And at 9 years old, I felt so guilty that under the cloak of darkness, I jumped the fence, crossed the busy street, put the stolen candy in the mailbox in front of...
Blog Posted by Amber of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
Both my boys are huge fans of Leonardo Di Caprio. My oldest loves the movie Titanic, and my youngest takes a liking to anything his older brother does, so we've read countless books, trivia, and watched a plethora of documentaries,...
Blog Posted by Nathalie Laitmon of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
God Lord Almighty why oh why do I do this to myself! Two days ago the girls and I decided to give our little swing set/playscape a face lift. What I envisioned as a fun, easy, summer family project turned...
Blog Posted by jennifer hurvitz of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
I just read the sweetest little article about divorce! It was really so sweet. It talked about how your children will "be okay" and your friends, and family will "be supportive" and how although it will take time, "It will all...
Blog Posted by Beth Segaloff of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
Over the last few years, I have begun healing from many stories in my past that have kept me from being my most authentic self. I continue to witness parts of myself unraveling while remembering that I am here to...
Blog Posted by Amber of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
A few years ago, I read a really fascinating book called Blink by Malcolm Gladwell. It's book about the science behind a gut feeling. It goes into depth about how the body and mind are actually wired to have intuition...
Blog Posted by Melissa Jacobowitz of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
There's often a village of humans helping us find our way in this crazy world, especially as we're growing up. The village may be comprised of our parents, grandparents, other relatives, friends of the family, teachers, etc... Not everyone's village...
Blog Posted by Sheila Qualls of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
Dear Sons, I fear I’ve failed you by teaching you skin color doesn’t matter … when clearly it does. Maybe I should’ve taught you something different. Something closer to the truth. Skin color does matter and I struggle with feeding you...
Blog Posted by Melissa Jacobowitz of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
My son's little league career ended this spring....it's quite alright....no big drama. He simply aged out of the program and doesn't have the skill or desire to continue on to more competitive teams... It was a wonderful experience for all of...
Blog Posted by Jill Wexler of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
I’m writing this on the anniversary of the Pulse nightclub massacre. And my heart is breaking again. A while back, I told you that I fell into reading gay male romance and what a trip that was. At the time...
Blog Posted by jennifer hurvitz of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
We bitch. We complain. We yap, whine...and crab. Yet, we expect our men to just hang around? Omg, ladies! What the hell is wrong with us? Wait, strike that. I need to change my pronoun. What is wrong with you?...
Blog Posted by Jill Wexler of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
I used to be a crafty, creative person. Decades before Pinterest existed, I fucking was the Pinterest. I used to make Christmas sweatshirts with iron on fabrics and puff paint. I painted wooden perpetual calendars and I was Modpodging the...
Blog Posted by Rebecca Mcdonald of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
Experience has taught me that not all things can be repaired or extinguished from our memories. When I was 18 years old I found myself in a predicament that I never thought i would find myself in at all. I...
Blog Posted by Melissa Fitzgerald - Liceaga of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
We lost my father-in-law this month. A man of 80 years whom I knew for 19 of those thru dating and then marrying my husband. "Mr. Juan" as I liked to call him was quiet and humble and I had...
Blog Posted by Melissa Jacobowitz of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
As I'm desperately working to finalize the yearbook for my daughter's elementary school, I keep thinking...WHY did I raise my hand for this? HOW did this happen? Did I really volunteer for this?! I mutter, "Man, this is a lot of work....
Blog Posted by fiona trafton of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
“Sisterhood”. Guilty as charged, I have used an abstract concept — a term that is used so frequently to try to point out, rationalize, explain, and sometimes to criticize so-called ‘natural’ relations between females. There are many other variations of the notional...
Blog Posted by marisa of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
On our weekly trip to the trampoline park I bring my daughter to the front desk to sign in. “What is your name?” the cashier asks. I tell her, and watch as she types my name into the system. “Here...
Blog Posted by Heather Burnett of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
I can see into the future. I can see all the way to Sunday when you will be let down by the Costco and Walgreen’s offerings your last minute family will present at your un-pedicured feet on Mother’s Day. I...
Blog Posted by Rebecca Mcdonald of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
So I'm not so sure about Tuesday's anymore. I work four ten hour shifts and Tuesday is my day off. It used to be filled with chasing kids around changing diapers making lunch, 2nd lunch and cleaning. My kids are...
Blog Posted by Karen Meister of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
Wednesday morning, I get a terrified plea from my 60+ year old long distance boyfriend. "I am in a lot of pain. I'm scared. I really want you here. Please fly up. I need you." Not one to panic, I...
Blog Posted by jennifer hurvitz of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
I was bullied. Not gonna lie. In fact, I was sexually assaulted. Yup. I was teased, too. And emotionally abused by my sorority sisters...and I'm pretty fucking sure I was date raped. After all, "No means no", right? Well, it...
Blog Posted by Patricia Wood of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
Maybe I'm crazy, or maybe I'm just a mom of toddlers. Maybe this doesn't happen for all moms, but there has to be some of you out there who are in the same shoes. Let me break down a little...
Blog Posted by Heather Burnett of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
There is one individual that can make me the happiest person on the planet only to turn me into a screaming, haggish, banshee within five seconds. That person is my sixteen-year-old daughter. Take last weekend for example. We were going...
Blog Posted by Jill Wexler of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
There are three guarantees in the parenting world. You were a better parent before you had kids. You will judge, however you might try not to, other parents with a “difficult” kid until you have one of your own. Your...
Blog Posted by jennifer hurvitz of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
Got your attention, right? Clearly, I have some explaining to do. After being divorced for almost four years, how can one say they’re in love with their Ex? Simple, I am. And actually, I love him more now than I...
Blog Posted by Erica of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
Emotional conflict is a terrible feeling. Two voices battling - feeling neither here nor there you know you have to choose. Of course you choose the expected one, but inside you're terrified. I attended a woman's support group. It...
Blog Posted by Heather Burnett of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
On any given Sunday in April, while you're tending your garden or perhaps strolling through the park, hundreds of mothers and daughters are descending upon stages across the country. Instead of enjoying the new crisp spring weather, they choose instead...
Blog Posted by lisa pomerantzster of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
This Yiddisheh mama has a major confession to make. I've been holding this one in, so bear with me. It comes from a lifetime ago. You SAHM's, like my Mrs., oh how I want to be you. Let me schmear (spread)...
Blog Posted by Erin Mantz of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
"Patient failing miserably!" My sixth-grader mistakenly saw this written on his chart at the orthodontist and was annoyed. I actually was, too. Not that my kid is perfect, but... First, even if "he" is "failing" his orthodontic treatment, I find that...
Blog Posted by Patricia Wood of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
"Hey Nana," I answered the phone, awaiting the latest update. "Well, they think they found him. His body hasn't been identified by the Cleveland police yet, but there is a body of a man in the matching car, and supposedly...
Blog Posted by Melissa Jacobowitz of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
One recent Wednesday afternoon my 3rd grade daughter - I'll just call her M - came off the bus visibly upset. She's a moody one, so sometimes she comes off the bus cranky and kvetchy, but this was full on misery. She...
Blog Posted by jennifer hurvitz of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
I need to sloooooooww my roll. Just slow my roll! It's a saying. Do you know it? My kids use it, I think. They also called me, "savage" the other day. Not so sure that's a good thing. But whatever. And...
Blog Posted by Sheila Qualls of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
Rude people are the reason the pick-up-your-dog-poop sign industry exists. Rude people SUCK! They mess up it up for everyone. They’re the reason we need “Please turn off your cell phone” signs. Is it really necessary to state the obvious?...
Blog Posted by Sheila Qualls of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
When I was a newlywed, I flew from Indianapolis, INDIANA, to Lawton, OKLAHOMA– 829 miles–(with multiple plane changes and weather delays) wearing nothing but a black teddy . . . and an overcoat. I was 22. I didn’t care about...
Blog Posted by Andra Maverick of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
Always Being On the Outside SUCKS. I attended my weekly yoga class and at the end of the hour, wandered out of the studio in my zen bliss. As I looked around, my bliss slowly faded into annoyance. ...
Blog Posted by Melissa Fitzgerald - Liceaga of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
It is an intense feeling I had no idea existed. Or why. Buried deep and unearthed only when I realized how much I missed. I was watching but I wasn't really listening or savoring. Then poof! My almost 8-year-olds hand...
Blog Posted by Ailish Delaney of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
Now, before anyone bites my head off, this is a line from Sex and the City – I was watching it last night and it got me thinking, not about whether women do want to be rescued, but whether men...
Blog Posted by marisa of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
I’ve just stripped down to my birthday suit and the steaming, inviting shower is ready and waiting for my grand entrance. I cannot wait to wash my hair, something I haven’t done in three days. My daughter is in the...
Blog Posted by Amber of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
Recently, my husband and I returned from a very relaxing, lazy, wonderful beach vacation. We decided a few months back it was mandatory that we go lie on a beach somewhere and do nothing for at least three days. We had the...
Blog Posted by Amber of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
When I think back on the hilariously ridiculous fights that my husband and I used to have prior to kids and marriage, I can’t help but look back endearingly. The disagreements we have now are far more grown up and...
Blog Posted by jennifer hurvitz of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
Read at your own risk. This will be "R" rated. You should either shut this shit down now, or hang on tight. But I'm giving you fair warning...this will not be for the "GASP did she really just say that-ers"!...
Blog Posted by Melissa Jacobowitz of Suburban Misfit Mom on October 16, 2017
"You're having a girl!" A wha? Really? "Yes, you see those 3 little lines? Those indicate girl parts." That completely took me by surprise. I figured that I'd be having another boy. Wow, a girl. Crap, a girl - ouch. Immediately I thought "drama"...
